The Evolution of Rachel
As a young girl I was happy and outgoing, naive and oblivious to the world around me. Life wasn’t perfect for me though, I did get abused both physically and emotionally by my parents, and still suffer from the pain of that happening. In elementary school (I went to Stansbury Elementary) I had a good group of friends and we would just sit and talk every recess. Once we had to transfer to junior high, they had to go to West Lake and I had to go to Eisenhower because of my parents dislike towards West Lake. West Lake wasn’t seen as a good school and both my sisters went there and didn’t have good outcomes so my parents wanted a different outcome for me. Eisenhower had a Gifted and Talented program while West Lake did not. Since it was in Taylorsville, I didn’t know anyone there in that area. I had to go to a new school with new people and I was not used to that. I never moved in my entire life previous to that so I didn’t know how to make new friends. Seventh grade was when it started to all go down hill. On the first day of school, also known as orientation, I couldn’t find my first class (which was math) and neither could this other girl so we had to follow one of the ninth grade SBOs to show us. I still don’t know what came over me but I decided to introduce myself to this girl. I smiled and said, “Hi my name’s Rachel,” and she just looked at me with a death glare and in a monotone voice said, “Mine is Joan,” and I just looked forward with my head down and thought that I wasn’t going to make any friends this year. Eventually as days went on Joan opened up to me and we became great friends and had almost all of our classes together. And as more time passed we made friends with a large group of people. Hunter, Devun, Cormac, Duncan, Aiden, Lauryn, and Logan just to name a few. As every year passed, people moved away to either other groups or other schools. Friends like Lauryn soon became bullies to me along with the one I already had. My own neighbor and another girl that lived down the street started to heavily bully me and finally got themselves suspended out of their own idiocy. In my freshman year my parents got divorced. All of these things took a toll on my mental health which was already suffering from when I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety in seventh grade. In my freshmen year, I got into a relationship with Hunter whom I was in a relationship with in seventh grade but broke it off because he had anger issues. We were together for two years and ended it three months before the end of my junior year because he was being abusive along with other colorful choices of words. So I moved onto someone else, and another, and another. Heartbreak after heartbreak, regret after regret, backstab after backstab, and love then hate. I was with Wyatt right after I broke up with Hunter. Wyatt was a suicidal psychopath to which he ended up bringing me down. After him was Andrew Pyper but everyone just calls him Pyper. I used to play hockey with him when I was doing private lessons with my goalie coach. He was 20 while I was 17 (I turn 18 in November) so he used that as one of his many excuses as to why he couldn’t be in a relationship with me. Fun fact: in the state of Utah if someone is under the age of 18 then their significant other can only be up to 7 years older. Pyper was only two years older… After Pyper was Cormac. I really liked him and thought he was better than the rest but boy was I wrong. He suckered me in and told me so many beautiful things and showered me in compliments but a few days later he told me we shouldn’t be together till he gets his life turned around but come to find out that was only half true. I don’t know what the rest of the truth is because he has another girlfriend (or probably multiple girlfriends). After all those relationships of family, friends, and significant others treating me poorly I came to become; a quiet and secluded person, I don’t trust anyone anymore except Joan, I am triggered very easily by people and situations, I have social anxiety, a hard time focusing in school, anger issues, and short and bad relationships. I’ve lost and am still losing friends slowly. I’m working on resolving all my issues in therapy with my new therapist Paisley. I hope to gain total control of my life and be a happier person overall. My life is ever changing.
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AuthorClass of 2017 at Taylorsville High School. My zodiac sign is a Scorpio. I love to sing, dance, paint, and play hockey. Archives |